#2 Haiku: Judgement

I said don’t judge me

Your judgement won’t be my fall

I have faith in me.

~Shambhavi

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Unrequited Love: What it’s like to be You

14519733_1165074796890027_9175346864870508178_n.pngI wonder what went by
In your mind, where I’m hiding shy.
I said goodbye and you were alright
No fight, no fear
I cried and you shed no tear.

You live and you lived,
With dreams of a girl
A girl I loathed, I queered.
I’ve tried, I’ve cried, and
Alas, I gave up that night.
I gave you one but many
Opportunities to hold my hand
All I seeked was love, your love;
Devoid of force or demand.

Who knew it would be so tough
To live and reel a quick sand deal
I got far ahead
Ahead of you!
Left behind was love that grew,
In my heart alone-
Alone all for myself.
You came around and fooled around
My heart that waited
For your inflicted wounds
to gape open.
To bleed like a raging river
of shining water
Red like skies awaiting thunder
Clouds that condense to cry
Like face that blushes before
A loud cry.

I waited and awaited
A call or an apology
All I received were empty words
On a day single like a solitary
cloud on a day of summer.
It has been years since then,
You went your way &
I turned to return but,
My feet got numb.
~Shambhavi

WON’T BACK DOWN

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I closed my eyes- To see your face

Face a mirror of your soul, of your lies

Where do we stand?

When will you come,

With an apology in hand?

May it seem easy for some,

Broken heart, shattered dreams,

What may come of it? Ignorant, are you?

Can you hear me scream?

Rants and whims all lost-

On a scary note at night.

My heart cried a shrill for toss-

Of meaningless feelings; fright!

Of what may come and what may go.

With a Crafty mind you were a scrupulous confidante!

They say you shall reap what you sow!

I doubt the redundant.

Will you mend what you’ve broken?

Will you be my lighthouse? I’ll be your sea. But, all you’ve done is left me shaken.

Trust? What that may be?

Caressing my wounds, my hope-

Was God and my indomitable flicker!

He came to save my life, with a rope,

And strength and wisdom, my faith grew deeper.

My soul survived the darkness,

Recovery touched me when I was low,

Filled me with invincible brightness.

Soaring high, I’ll connive you foe!

~ Shambhavi


P.S: Sometimes we are left with only ourselves, cause we wouldn’t want to upset our loved ones. Though they wouldn’t mind listening to our rant and advice accordingly. It’s just that we wouldn’t want them to worry about us, trying to spare them the dark side of the person who they love. Trying hard to uplift my mood.

Verbal diarrhoea


That ‘me’ within needs no tongue to express

It’s mal-functional when I’m in distress.

I wonder what I’ve on my mind

Whether an extraordinaire or the daily rind.

It’s not the unexpected turn of events I fear

Is it the plain pressure what they call of peer?

Oh Madame moiselle, I may correct you

Hello how are you? How do you do?!

Not just exchange of few verbal bizarre

At times, my mouth goes topsy turvy over par

I’m scared of nothing but my mistakes

Pardon me, I’ll try to pull the brakes

Over this very fear

I promise never to shed any tear

Over the matter so menial

As a matter of fact I’m being real.

I hate pleasing

As a matter of fact, that word isn’t appealing

At all I must add a few

It’s not just that I hate one or two

There are many that makes this ‘me’

Fall of the curve, down that C

Verbal diarrhoea they say

Has no cure whatever may

I tried hard and harder not to fail

My sea is mine and my boat is all mine to sail

Cease, is what I could afford

But, what do I do of all the emotional load?

Some say, suppress it, some say express it

When I do as they say, they don’t suffer one bit

At last I now know of that,

It’s your life, wear your choice of hat

Dress like a stripper or a clown

Up you go or down you drown

You got your soul

Hold yourself and up you roll

Your sleeves of wisdom

Continue your tandem

Beats of expression

Leave it all, have no tension.

~Shambhavi

Change

When words meant

nothing

I tried being silent

You messaged me once

You messaged me twice

And ’twas the last.

I told you to go away

And for a change

you said Yes

Without a fight.

That night everything

changed

Perhaps not you but,

My life changed

My world changed

I changed.

Since, I haven’t

looked back

And, I won’t be

looking either.

~Shambhavi

Confession of a Chaotic mind-Part 1


I feel like crying right now;

Cause, it’s taking a lot in me

To fight the fight

that’s happening around me.

An endless, tiresome cycle

Of misery and commotion,

Inside my head that refuses

To cease.

I’m tired of the chaos;

And I’ll fight till

the chaos gets tired of me.

~Shambhavi